100 (very random) things about me.

Hope mentioned the "100 things about me" post on her site. I've seen it and thought it challenging so here it is. (I actually learned a little about myself by writing it and highly recommend it...even if you don't share it.)

1- I have been married 16 years this July.
2- I have two kids 12 and 10.
3- I am a 911 Dispatcher.
4- I used to be an over the road truck driver.
5- I’ve been a Volunteer Firefighter for 13 years.
6- I was in the Navy.
7- I am a Christian. (Thanks Mom)
8- My Wife and I eloped.
9- Her parents found out by reading the newspaper.
10- I don’t smoke.
11- I graduated from Law Enforcement Academy.
12- I never pursued a career in Law Enforcement.
13- I am a Republican.
14- I should be a Libertarian.
15- I have been in mortal combat and had to fight for my life. I’ve never been so scared.
16- I was stabbed in the stomach during an altercation.
17- My “spare tire” (extra weight around the midsection) saved my life.
18- I’ve been mugged twice, and robbed twice more.
19- I now carry a gun EVERYWHERE I go. (almost)
20- I know nothing of auto mechanics.
21- I once saved a little girl who was choking on a large marble. Her mother didn't even say thanks.
22- I "discovered" what a capacitor was by trying to work on my air conditioner. I have never tried to work on it since.
23- I believe EVERY American regardless of race, color, creed, religion, background, economic status or handicap has the same opportunities for success.
24- I believe the word “militia” in the 2nd Amendment does not mean National Guard.
25- I was once bitten by a rattle snake. I drove 40 miles to a hospital.
26- I have 20/20 vision.
27- I’ve been to all 48 contiguous states, Mexico, and 4 Canadian Provinces.
28- I once won a disco contest. Yes…a disco contest. No…I don’t dance anymore.
29- I grew up living in a Funeral Home most of my life. (My Dad is a mortician.)
30- By age 8 I had seen and touched every organ in the human body.
31- I did well in biology.
32- I played high school football.
33- I wish I hadn’t. I would’ve made better grades.
34- I’ve broken my nose 4 times.
35- The person whom I most admire is my Grandfather.
36- I believe everyone is ordinary and no one is extraordinary.
37- I believe ordinary people are capable of extraordinary things.
38- Since I’ve been old enough to vote, I’ve voted in every presidential election.
39- My heritage is Scottish. Yet I don’t call myself “Scottish American”…just American.
40- I weigh more now than at any other time in my life…that’s a little depressing.
41- 235 lbs, solid….well, mostly solid……OK kinda solid.
42- One of my proudest moments is snatching a paddle from my first stepfather’s hand and telling him he wouldn’t be spanking me today… I was 15. I had brought home a D on my report card.
43- I’ve never been arrested. (Thanks again Mom.)
44- Once I accidentally sprayed pepper spray up my nose. I thought would die.
45- My favorite movie is Forest Gump.
46- I have frequent nightmares and average 4 hours of sleep a night.
47- I am a perfectionist and frequently place unusually high expectations on myself.
48- I am addicted to nasal spray. I have bottles strategically placed in the house, car and at work. My wife gave me 50 boxes of the stuff for Christmas.
49- I don’t fear dying, and I don’t fear being dead, but I do fear growing old.
50- The day my son was born was the day I realized there are some things worth dying for.
51- I’ve reached the age of self reflection. I no longer care about other’s shortcomings so much as my own. I believe it to be one of the biggest milestones in my life.
52- I suffer from chronic sciatica. It is often debilitating. I have crutches in my bedroom that never get put away.
53- My dog, Magnus, is the ultimate example of loyalty one could ever hope to see.
54- I am bald. I do have to shave my beautiful head but increasingly less each year.
55- When I was 13 I couldn’t wait until I had to shave….now I cannot stand it.
56- I am a patriot. It is a disturbingly small club.
57- I do not believe in compulsory military service in the United States, but I do believe every High School Senior should experience Boot Camp.
58- I’ve never collected a government handout. (To include welfare or food stamps, yet there was a time when I definitely would’ve qualified.)
59- I’ve had more jobs than birthdays…a lot more.
60- I want to get my pilot’s license. One day I will.
61- I have an invention that anyone who has seen (including a reputable patent attorney) believes would make me stinking rich. Yet I cannot afford the patent process.
62- I should’ve been an attorney. I have a gift for arguing. I can argue about something I don’t even believe in. Perhaps I’ve missed my calling.
63- I love to cook.
64- I would rather be flogged than wash dishes.
65- I don’t cook much.
66- I once caught a man who was impersonating a Naval Officer. I noticed his medals were out of order so I pointed to a sea ribbon and asked him what he got it for and he said “from serving in Kosovo.” What a maroon! He was being detained by the police as I left. I hope he was arrested.
67- I nearly died from pertussis (Whooping Cough) when I was a child.
68- My first car was a Mustang. It was a piece of crap. 1980 model, 4 banger, 0-60 in 2 minutes, brown over copper and butt assed ugly.
69- My first job was as a food porter in a hospital. I washed a lot of dishes for around 3 dollars an hour. Probably why I hate it so bad now.
70- I drink too much caffeine.
71- I have smoked marijuana. I inhaled. I liked it. Were it legal, I might still.
72- Just for shits and giggles, my friend and I once planted a marijuana sprout in the flower bed of the US Post Office. It grew to six feet before someone realized what it was and cut it down. Man, that flower bed was fertile.
73- I almost decapitated myself by driving my dirt bike under the guy wire of a telephone pole.
74- On a dare, I tried to chase a bull on my dirt bike. The bull didn’t move. I dumped my bike to keep from hitting it and the bull chased me all the way back to the fence. I had to wait for nightfall to go back and get my bike.
75- On a dare I tried to jump Hwy 92 in Dallas GA on the same dirt bike. I nearly landed on a street motorcycle that was coming around the curve.
76- I once tried to show off for a girl on my dirt bike by doing a wheelie. I fell off the back and the bike continued down the road and hit her dad’s van. She wasn’t at all impressed.
77- I will never allow my son to own a dirt bike.
78- I can laugh at myself, but I prefer to laugh at you.
79- I am a Florida Gator fan. I also like Georgia Tech. You can do that, they’re in two separate conferences.
80- I wish someone would interpret the dream where you go to work or school only to later realize your still in your underwear. I have that dream at least once a week.
81- I heard on the Lex and Terry morning radio show that all boys eat boogers…I have never ever eaten a booger.
82- I have eaten a grub worm and various insects at the Aircrew Land Survival Course while in the Navy.
83- I will never again eat a grub worm.
84- The sight of your blood does not bother me….the sight of mine bothers me a great deal.
85- I am a fantastic kisser…at least that's what.....no wait....no that was a dream.
86- I have my tongue pierced. (call me a rebel)
87- I enjoy country music.
88- I find it difficult to read an entire book.
89- I am a 6th generation native Floridian. (that’s not very common)
90- I do voice impressions very well.
91- Most of the time I do not like being alone.
92- I regularly exceed the posted speed limit.
93- My IQ is high enough for membership in MENSA. I have no desire to join MENSA.
94- I wish I had applied myself more in High School.
95- My manager has Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (no shit). I commonly rearrange things on his desk to aggravate his condition.
96- I tend to be pessimistic, although I like to think of myself as realistic.
97- I am suspicious of strangers.
98- I believe it is rude and improper to make eye contact with a stranger for more than 5 seconds without speaking. Anyone who does so to me will likely be spoken to.
99- I consider myself to be a rather impatient person.
100- Although I am slow to forget trespasses, I forgive them easily.